exams!

Finished today with my exam! But, I have a funny feeling I'll be back in the UK, if not in Edinburgh before too long. I'll leave end of May for London and fly home early to mid July. Then much longed for time with my grandparents in South Georgia and family. But in the mean time, loving the days to explore Edinburgh! And Marc larance may visit this weekend. :)

Ending

To be honest, I'm not sure what to say. I have one exam tomorrow at half two. I'm not very worried, and I probably should be. I love the brilliant blue skies of the last few days, and the presence of the wind constantly reminds me I am not in North Carolina.

I have been learning to love. To accept love. To accept love despite disappointment. To forgive. To rest in love and know that it is enough. I'm not sure I know these things yet, but see them dimly, and wonder. I'm beginning to orient myself towards home again, which is a funny feeling. After coming back in some ways I feel like I've just begun life in Edinburgh again. I should like to come back I think and live here. But the world is so wide, should I bother with other places I won't like as well? And home. I have a strange lack of homesickness which I find almost disturbing.

Arthur's Seat

Being back in Edinburgh has been wonderful. On SaturdaymI and my friend Don, climbed Arthur's seat. It was wonderful. Strong sky, specked with clouds, sub brilliant, and the wind, oh the wind. It was as if the wind was alive, reminding me I had blood in my veins, stirring the color in my cheeks, and the gulls crying loudly over the Swan loch, calling my name, again and again.

Tonight, Gillian and I went to a wee pub. I wrote for the first time in ages. Just writing pieces. One about Caleb and the promised land. One about the wind. One about how the navigations between girls and guys and pulling works in clubs. Good just to let it out and drink a pint of cider with a good friend. We need to do this more often: deliberately make time for ourselves and beauty.

Landing in Italy

Poor Liz, my travel companion to Italy, was very kind to put up with me in Italy. When our plane landed, I think we were both shocked by the sun. Not that there isn't any sun in Edinburgh. When the light shines, its brilliant. I guess subconsciously I'd just come not to expect the sun. And the heat. After an embarrassing attempt to withdraw money at a atm that wasn't actually an atm, we caught a bus to the tube in Rome, where which took us literally to our hostel's door steps.

We unpacked, wandered around, and found gelato! Gelato. I think we had that every day. My first one was purely dark chocolate, but the Italians love to mix flavors, especially two or three different types. And my, that was heavenly!

We unpacked, rested, and about 7 decided to go out and hunt for some dinner and then go try a club. However, we didn't realize the Italian time schedule. For Italians:
Breakfast: croissant and espresso
Lunch and siesta: 1-3 everything shuts down
Dinner: 8-9
Go out: 12 midnight

So, we tried to go to a club, but it ended up being a bit sketch, so we went to the nearest restaurant, and ate pizzas! Delicious! By the time, we'd finished, I wasn't comfortable to go out, so we asked the waiter to call us a cab and off to home we went.

The Grave of Keats

We took the tube to Pirami station and roughly followed the map behind the Pyramid, following a large stone wall with small barred windows. We entered the Protestant cemetary through large wroght iron bars. My first thought was the beauty and I was quite breath taken. There were neat gravel paths with green, carefully trimmed plants and trees all over the garden. We wound our way to Shelley, and soon I went off to the left to seach for Keats. Ducking under a stone wall, I followed a path through much less crowded field. In the corner, lay Keats, with "here is lies a young poet whose name was writ in water." Next to him lay his best friend, and his best friend's child.

I thought of Oscar Wilde and how he fell and wept upon Keat's grave. The thought of Oscar Wilde standing in the same spot I did, and crying, made me feel as if I should cry. But no one loves false tears. So it began to rain instead. I pulled up the collar on my green coat and just stared. Writ in water. And here in Italy.

I don't have much against Catholics. But after seeing many Catholic churches earlier that day, I found much more peace in that vibrant cemetery with ivy and lilacs growing on the walls and at the foot of graves. Cats prowled around, protectors of the grave. I'm not over-fond of cats, but there was something calming about their presence, watching over the souls of the quick and the dead.

Venice

Liz and I tried to go to Venice for a day. On our way there, it began to rain lightly. Then I heard an enormous clap of thunder, and saw the electrical wire by our train shooting sparks. Our train stopped as soon as possible and we halted for 45 minutes. I think our train had been struck by lightning and instead of going to Venice, we headed back to Bologna. As this was our second attempt to go, sometimes its silly to contest against the hand of God.